These pics were taken at Drew's sister Sarah's wedding in December.

All 3 sister in laws were pregnant together...

Shawni was due in March

Amy was due in April 

I was due in June

I cried again...

I cried again....

What's new? I'm always crying. I keep feeling like I want this all to be done.  Yesterday I wanted to get on my knees and tell Heavenly Father that I have been tried enough.  It's really tested me and it's been hard... but that now I want her back.  I'm just so sick of feeling sad about it.  I am ready to be happy and to move on from this.  It's just such a heavy hurt and it's one that I can't fix.  Every day I wake up and it's still broken. I still miss her.